a precious gem

Haven't felt this way for so long, and to be honest, I'm really enjoying it :) though I don't know how things will turn out, I'm keeping my fingers crossed indefinitely. Now I have a secret, do you?

Also, going off to le island Paradis tomorrow. I'm spending money I don't have but it's fine. Am really looking forward to the sun exposure, no not Melaka-like sweltering killer heat but the nice, windy, beach-side type. But hey, let's not get too burned this time, can't afford another 6 months to pale away.

To Li, my love, please don't worry too much. I can't tell u how much I miss you, hang in there allright. I'm always praying for you.

Its been 5 months since that day. Tonight, I lived it for you. For all that we had before, it was beautiful and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Do not get me wrong, my Loves. Think not that I am stuck here, if only they would understand. All that feels are excited, for that alone I will always remember you.

It's allright if they don't, for that I know what this is :)

black & heavy

This is a letter of hate. Nothing good will come out from acknowledging these spiteful emotions, but it needs to come out, before it manifests itself into something irreversible.

I know you. I know each and every single cell inside of you. I know your games, I know your tricks, I know how you make a person sway, I know what makes you tick, what makes your heart beats faster. What I don’t know is how you can sit around idly and just watch people who care about you writhing away like dust?

How can something u preached sounds so beautiful, and yet when it’s time to make the words real you choose to turn your back against it?It really hurts me, and I’m sure it hurts others out there too. I can’t believe someone who has worked so much to have something to call theirs, lets it go the moment it is.

I hate you, the more I think about it that page that was written months ago seems true again. Everything he said was true. I can’t sit around and let you use me again. Not anymore. I hate your words. No truth comes out of it anymore. I hate your thoughts, they don’t seem to matter the things that does. I hate everything about you, enough to make me disappear for good after this. She did, why shouldn’t I?

I am not the first one to say this, maybe u should take a look around and see how you are sucking the life out of people. Maybe I don’t want to be the latter anymore.

Goodbye. I hope I have enough strength to leave you now.